新浪的登陆名死活想不起，于是又登陆了这个废弃很久的空间。发现之前老头的照片链接也作废了，确实荒的不算短。

以为只是自己的离开，就这样离开，或许称为自我隔离比较合适.自嘲的是,即便简单如"你",也一样很快的离开我了.呵呵.我亲爱的空间.

很喜欢suzanne vega,从luka开始,还有tom's dinner

今天饶有兴致的重温了一下,外面下雨了,感觉不到,只是闻到罢了.好像歌中的情景也是发生在雨天吧.老天还挺配合.

 

Tom's Diner

I am sitting in the morning
At the diner on the corner
I am waiting at the counter
For the man to pour the coffee

And he fills it only halfway
And before I even argue
He is looking out the window
At somebody coming in

"It is always nice to see you"
Says the man behind the counter
To the woman who has come in
She is shaking her umbrella

And I look the other way
As they are kissing their hellos
I'm pretending not to see them
And instead I pour the milk

And I open up the paper
There's a story of an actor
Who had died while he was drinking
It was no one I had heard of

And I'm turning to the horoscope
And looking for the funnies
When I'm feeling someone watching me
And so I raise my head


There's a woman on the outside
Looking inside. Does she see me?
No she does not really see me
Cause she sees her own reflection

And I'm trying not to notice
That she's hitching up her skirt
And while she's straightening her stockings
Her hair has gotten wet

Oh, this rain it will continue
Through the morning as I'm listening
To the bells of the cathedral
I am thinking of your voice…

And of the midnight picnic
Once upon a time before the rain began…
I finish up my coffee
It's time to catch the train

接着写吧,有一种状态始终存在于生命中,不能说是怯懦,也不能说是笃定.就是一种状态,一种无法前进也不能后退的状态...

心理再清楚不过总会有天这种状态会被打破,或许结果在之前就是注定的,只是个人在苦苦挣扎,无谓的拖拽时间的脚步.

在这时,我们似乎多了更多思考的时间,抛去一切可能干扰混淆的因素,更接近真实,这种状态就此看来也不错.只是往往思索寻找的过程总是格外痛苦,或许我更偏向怯懦些吧.抗拒改变,抗拒前进,抗拒复杂.越明白越痛苦,把它当作牺牲吧,就这么自我麻醉,永远不要醒来好了.

其实想说的是,我们都是治疗过去的伤痛直到新的伤痛再次来临.如此往复.每个人心理都有一处隐蔽的最安全的地方,那是我们的避难所. 有时我们沉默,有时我们狂暴......都是自我保护,我们在自己的避难所里窥视,貌似一切事不关己.

忽然有个想法,这个状态,这个我们强大的避难所,如果按上述的思路去走,是长满荆棘的,我们该怎么办?

发现自己真的真的很不坚强,真的真的很脆弱,或许只有我的避难所是这样的吧